Powered by Schneider's Bakery, Inc.

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

QUIZ: Is Your Friend’s Girlfriend Real?

Does your friend have a “girlfriend” nobody’s ever met, and they don’t have pics???

Take this quiz to find out whether or not your friend’s girlfriend is an actual living breathing human being that is dating your friend, or 100% imaginary. This quiz is brought to you by Saturday May 16th’s BRAND-NEW Henry Danger episode, “Jasper’s Real Girlfriend”!

1.   Does your friend’s girlfriend have a REALLY weird last name that maybe includes the names of objects they saw while they were desperately looking around the room, trying to come up with a believable last name?
A)     I thought that Tablechairbowlton sounded legit?
B)     No, it’s Dragonslaya
C)     It’s plain old Smith!

2.     Why haven’t you met your friend’s girlfriend yet?
A)     She’s on the planet Jupiter, having trouble catching a ride  home.
B)     She fell down a well!
C)     She lives really far away, but she’s saving up money for a  visit!

3.     Why haven’t you seen a picture of your friend’s girlfriend?
A)    Your friend says she happens to be transparent, and therefore    invisible in photos
B)    Her family thinks that if someone takes a pic of you, it steals your  soul, so she doesn’t want to risk it
C)    My friend says their dog swallowed their hard drive, which happened   to contain the only known photos of their mythical girlfriend.

4.     How did your friend meet their girlfriend?
A)    On one of their motorcycle trips
B)    Prison for kids
C)    In group therapy

5.     How does your friend keep in touch with their girlfriend?
A)    Mind reading— they have an amazing connection!
B)    Postcards—they’re hopeless romantics!
C)    E-mail—It’s 2015.

6.    What does your friend like most about their girlfriend?
A)    Her Olympic gold medals
B)    She’s a Kardashian
C)    She’s really funny


Well… FAKE!!! FAKE! FAKEY FAKE FAKE! This girl is FAKE! Listen, you know she’s fake, your friend knows she’s fake, so you should just sit back, relax, and let your friend regale you with stories about the time their girlfriend won a tuna fishing competition, or ate snow in Antarctica, or has a room of the Empire State Building named after her. 

IT’S HARD TO SAY!! You don’t want to accuse your friend of having a fake girlfriend, only to have Courtney Sham from Fibberton show up at your school, making you look like a jerk who didn’t believe their friend, so here’s an idea: why don’t you suggest you AND your friend make a visit TOGETHER to see their fake girlfriend?! If they refuse, you know something’s up, and if they agree, YOU GET A WEEKEND IN FIBBERTON!

Nothing is certain in life, but it sounds to me like your friend might have a bonafide girlfriend.  No need to get too suspicious, so just play along and don’t make a big deal of it, or you might end up upsetting your pal.

For more on the subject of fake girlfriends, consult your local library, and tune into Saturday May 16th’s BRAND-NEW Henry Danger episode, “Jasper’s Real Girlfriend”! 8 PM (7c) on Nickelodeon!